For the Fuck Niggas Who Think They're Good Dudes
Before we get into this, let’s review. If you don’t watch Insecure, you may have seen all the jazz about Tasha, Lawrence, and Issa and want to engage in conversation, but you don’t have a clear understanding of events. Here’s what you need to know. Basically, Lawrence found comfort in Tasha’s pussy during his time of heartache after his ex, Issa, cheated on him with a nigga with a better beard. So, after three months of trying to sort his feelings through smashing Tasha, Lawrence acted in the moment and gave Issa two pumps and a twirl-- literally. Because he’s such a “good guy”, he was truthful about his actions to Tasha. In the moment, Tasha was upset, but eventually took his ass back. In taking him back, she invites him to her family cookout. This nigga decided that he would attend the cookout, but upon arrival decided that it wasn’t the scene for him and ditched to attend a “work event”. Basically, he went and got drunk with his colleagues. At the end of the show Tasha gives Lawrence the read that he so deserves. She informed him that he was worse than a fuck nigga… he was a fuck nigga that thinks he’s a good dude.
Now, that you’re caught up, let’s dive into the read for these “good dude”.
For many people with a soul, their intent is never to hurt someone. They never want to intentionally be the cause of someone’s pain. But as we know, life isn’t always about your intent. Shit happens and while you don’t want to hurt anyone, you end up breaking a few hearts and making a few folks cry. Fuck niggas who think they’re nice guys are the mostly likely to fall victim to the “I didn’t mean to hurt anyone… I’m so sorry… you deserve better.” Let’s take a gander how these niggas come to be.
First, we must unpack how intent and impact are completely different things and ultimately, impact > intent. It doesn’t matter what you didn’t mean to do while she’s crying her eyes out. All that matters at that point is the lasting IMPACT your actions will have on her in future relationships. This is because you were too busy trying to SEEM like a nice guy, so you didn’t want to be truthful and forthcoming. So, you attempted to spare feelings and have some short-term fun. However, the hurt of a long-term situation is much greater than that of something short lived. Moral of the story, be honest and upfront about… everything. After all, what makes you a good guy is your ability to be honest and transparent.
I know, I know. You don’t want to be “that guy”. The guy that goes to the club only seeking a one-night situation or only use a woman for sex. But see, just as much as you’re in the club looking for a quick night of fun, there is someone else in the same club matching your vibe. In the same way, there are some women who are out here looking for someone to lay the pipe down and go home. And looking for a situation as such doesn’t make you a “bad guy”— it makes you human. You just want to have sex and release some frustration and that’s perfectly fine. Just be honest about what you’re trying to do and move on to your two pumps and a twirl sex game. If you think that you can’t be honest about your intent because she might not let you smash, you’re on the path to becoming a fuck nigga and you should abort plans as soon as possible to avoid causing further damage. Don’t wait for an invite to the family cookout before you have your epiphany about wanting to “be cool”. That’s not player and it may lead to you being cussed out.
Last, just remember that if you’re in doubt about whether you’re wasting someone’s time, stop and THINK. Think about what you’re signaling versus your actual wants at the moment. Are you giving “I want to be with you exclusively” vibes while you’re still texting your ex? If so, stop and leave the situation before it’s gone too far. If you’re upfront about your plans for the relationship, that will give the women a choice in the matter of wasting her time. I’ve talked to plenty of friends who know the niggas they’re talking to are a complete waste of time, but they don’t care because… dick is good.
As for the “Tasha’s” of the world. Don’t feel bad, sis. We’ve all been there. Even the ones that say they haven’t, they have. We’ve all been in a place where we’ve been afraid to ask the important status questions because we were afraid of the answer that would follow. Whether that question be, “I’m looking for a relationship, are you?” or “We’ve been together for some time now and I want to be married…. Soon. Is that how you’re feeling?” So, we assume, to our own downfall, that we’re on the same page and continue living in a fantasy. It’s okay to be in this space, just make sure you don’t stay there. Learn from the mistake and demand more of your time and effort the next time. Don’t keep inviting this nigga to your cookouts when he won’t even take you out on a legitimate date and y’all gotta split the shrimp poppers when you do FINALLY leave the house.
I hope this helps someone who is trying out there hoe’ing capabilities.
Afros and Ovaries
If you didn’t cum, he don’t count, sis.